Why does stress happen?

Stress is caused by the contrast between what is and the image of how one wants it to be–when one takes the image as reality, and realise that it’s not. And in a situation there is always the controllable part (one’s own decision) and uncontrollable part (how the situation unfolds and turns out).

When one:

• fails to distinguish between what is under control and what isn’t, or
• focuses too much on the uncontrollable part and the unreal image,

stress and anxiety happens.

How to deal with it:

• assess the situation as is, without wishful thinking
• assess what is under control and what factually is not
• concentrate on and execute the controllable part, one thing at a time.

On a curious side note, it is indeed amazing how one’s experience with the same thing could be drastically different and totally enjoyable when attention is entirely poured into it.